DLM Challenge

Among the things I love in life, high on the list is the movie watching experience. Going to a theater, getting some popcorn, settling in, watching the previews (seriously one of my favorite things on earth). The sound, vibrating your chest, the visuals. I love it all. Comedies, dramas, action/adventure, documentary … pretty much any genre I love them all. I really love watching movies.

I also love comedy in general. Stand up in particular. So there is one comedian who also loves movies and I listen to his podcast regularly: Doug Loves Movies (if you like movies and comedy, I highly recommend it). This year, Doug is holding a challenge of sorts. In honor of leap year, watch 366 movies this year. So, I’m going to try it. I discovered it late (about two and a half weeks into the new year) so I’m already behind, but I’m gonna give it a go anyway, because I love movies. I’m hoping it will encourage me to see more movies in the theater, something that my kids and I love to do together. But also, between Netflix and Hulu and the other online streaming services, movies are easy to get and watch.

Now, I’m not a professional critic by any stretch of the imagination, but I am going to also attempt to do a review of sorts when I watch something. Technically, I’ve already reviewed Movie #3: Lazer Team. I will try to come back to #1: Star Wars: The Force Awakens and #2: The Skeleton Twins when I have a chance.

Anyway. Here’s to a shit ton of movies this year!

Lazer Team – Haaaaaaaaay


To talk about “Lazer Team”, I need to talk about Rooster Teeth a little bit first. I’ll save any in depth talk for a separate post, but quickly, Rooster Teeth is a company that produces online content. From animated series to video game play based series to comedy series, they cover it. If you are a gamer who loves comedy, or a comedy lover who plays video games, I encourage you to check them out. Great, funny, entertaining stuff. For serious.

Now, they have created some online short documentaries and other things, but Lazer Team is a full-length movie, the first of many I hope. After a hugely successful Indiegogo campaign (over $2.4 million in one month – an Indiegogo record), they started production and finally released the film in select theaters worldwide this week.

I discovered Rooster Teeth and Lazer Team through my son, Jamison, who is an avid gamer, and comedy and movie lover, much like myself. So, when I saw that there was an opportunity to see this movie the week before his 15th birthday, They released the movie using the Tugg platform (more info about that here), where the showing of the movie is based upon the interest at the local market. We ended up with two screenings here in Columbus, and the last time I checked they were 50-ish tickets away from a third showing next week. Needless to say, Jamison was thrilled that we were going to get to be a part of this.

Shortly after I bought the tickets, I got an email with a link to limited edition merchandise available only to ticket holders. So naturally, I got two t-shirts for us to wear to the movie.

please excuse my shitty selfie taking skills

Fast forward to last night, and the screening. We arrived early, so we could secure good seats, and I’m glad we did. Both screenings last night were sold out, apparently there are lots of RT fans in Columbus. After sitting, I took the obligatory selfies, much to the chagrin of my son.


(I am not good at selfies. Clearly)

The movie started and being in that room with all of those fans was pretty awesome. Before the official movie kicked off, we got a nice message from Matt Hullum, CEO of Rooster Teeth, thanking us for being there and thanking any Indiegogo contributors that happened to be in the audience, of which there were quite a few. The movie starts and it was just as I had expected it to be. Now, non-RT fans may not love this movie, but I don’t care, because I love them and I loved it. AV Club described it as resembling “a mash up of Super Troopers and Independence Day, with a smattering of Ghostbusters.” Which is pretty much spot on. I’m happy to report that at this moment, they have a 64% on Rotten Tomatoes, which when considering the kind of movie this is, it could be much, much worse. Now, the audience score is at 90%, but it’s a fan driven movie distributed on a fan-driven platform, so that makes sense.

Another perk, in addition to exclusive merchandise, we got some extra footage at the theater. After the movie ended, and after rousing applause, Matt came back and thanked us and then introduced a deleted scene, which was fantastic. And then he came back and introduced the blooper reel – which is one of my all time favorite things ever. I love a good blooper reel, and this didn’t disappoint.


Every single person sat through all of the credits, naturally. And every single person who contributed to the Indiegogo campaign was listed in the credits. Love that.


It was a great experience. Some of my favorite moments were spotting all of the Rooster Teeth folks in various cameo roles in the movie. In particular Gus Sorola as “Disheveled Scientist,” Chris Demarais as “Franksen,”  Barbara Dunkleman as “Cheerleader,” and Blaine Gibson as “Hospital Guard #1.”

Also (I think I was alone in my overwhelming excitement at this) Ed Robertson from Barenaked Ladies was in the movie! Yaaaaaas! He played a news reporter (naturally) and it made my heart so, so happy. (Please refer back to my post here about the Barenaked Ladies to see about their previous work with Rooster Teeth).

Ultimately, I’m super happy I got to share this with my son. Watching these YouTube videos and listening to the pod casts and talking about these people is something we share that is pretty awesome and cool. Being able to share this with him and having him enjoy it so much = very, very cool.

So, thank you Rooster Teeth, for allowing my son and I to have some pretty awesome stuff to bond over. You guys rock!


(Seriously. I take the worst pictures ever.)

Hockey is the Best

I am a hockey fan. I’m not a crazy obsessed kind of fan, but I follow it enough and really enjoy watching it.

I stumbled across this gifset on Tumblr and thought it was absolutely fantastic. It tells the story of two men who are passionately and obsessively devoted to their teams in a way that may be a little unique to hockey. I mean, it is a sport where (in a way) fighting is encouraged and looked upon as part of the game.

I like to call the following set of photos: Every Water Bottle Matters

My Girl

Last week I posted about my son, today is about my daughter.senior picture

We have been through a lot the two of us.

We have a very close and complicated and wonderful relationship. I’m not sure what I’d do without her in my life.

So, here is a photo retrospective, a Flashback if you will, to the last almost 22 years with this girl in my life:




She has always been beautiful. Even when she was little and had all those “Shirley Temple” style curls.

baby with phone





She was ridiculously cute and was super sassy

Cute and SassyAs she grew she went from just adorable to downright gorgeous.

looking down

She retained her sassy side and developed a great personality. Which served her well when she participated in the theater program at her high school.

Theaterbarbershop 2


She also developed an amazing singing voice, and currently sings in a barbershop chorus with me. I am honored to be able to see her singing and performing on a regular basis.


barbershop collage

big boy

Along with that sassy side, she is also quite silly.

A giant goofball actually.

I mean seriously.

She makes me laugh.silly collage

She has a ton of friends and loves them all fiercely.

friends collage

And I am super lucky that she loves her little brother more than almost anything else on earth.

lex and j

I credit the 7 year difference and her enormous love for her brother as being the reason she is so amazing with children and why taking care of them is probably what she will do for a living. She’s great at it.

with kids

She and I have been through a lot and will continue to face all of the crap life throws at us together. She is my best friend and I love her to the moon and back.

With Me Collage

She is simply the best. And I love her.

smile collage



Throwback Thursday: A Day in The Life

Back in 2008 I was taking a photography class and as an assignment I followed my son around for two days and took some photos of him. I rediscovered this album the other day and am reminded of two things. 1) time flies. 2) my son is a pretty unusual, interesting, and awesome human. Keep in mind as we move forward, that he was seven years old when these pictures were taken, and right at the peak of his amazing and unlimited imaginative self.

I present to you: A Day In The Life: Jamison Calland (Age 7)

These photos were taken over two days, a Saturday and Sunday, the summer of 2008.


Like most 7 year old boys, he liked to start his Saturday morning with some breakfast (which was most likely a Pop Tart of some variety) and some cartoons. This was followed by getting dressed, brushing teeth and putting on shoes.

3484262607_1a683e176e_o 3484264635_1981b217fa_o

I hate to say it, but he never ties his shoes any more. He’s learned that thing that guys learn, where they tie them “just enough” so they can slip them off and on. He hates having to wear his boots, because they force him to tie his shoes. It’s the little things.

On this particular Saturday, we took a trip to one of his most favorite places on the planet (even to this day) the zoo. In our case: The Columbus Zoo.


He has always loved being in control of the map. He gets that from me. Maps are cool. Also, being in control is cool.

3484397013_a7bc64c552_o 3485209496_3164b6d660_o 3484398869_6e6718d9da_o

For as long as I can remember, Jamison has said that he wants to be a Marine Biologist when he grows up. Even now he still has that as something he’d like to do for a living. That being said, Jamison doesn’t have a full zoo experience if he doesn’t get down and dirty and touch as many things as he can. Above he can be seen touching a jellyfish, waiting on some Lorikeet to eat out of his cup, and petting a goat.


I spoke in my last post about Jamison that he was kind. Here he is holding the door at the aquarium for people. I will never forget this moment, because he held the door for just about every person at the zoo. I literally stood there for 5-7 minutes while he held the door for people. He never had a “break” in people and didn’t want to close the door on anyone … so he just stood there … until I physically moved him away. It was simultaneously the sweetest and most ridiculous thing ever.


Obligitory “Falling Asleep On The Way Home From The Zoo” photo.


Day Two

Sunday was a pretty standard summer day for Jamison when he was 7. We kicked around at home for a bit. Went to the park. Got some ice cream. Ya know, normal little boy things. It was a great day.


I’m sure it won’t come as a surprise that Jamison loves Legos. He would spend hours and hours and hours playing with Legos. He currently has an entire 4.5 foot tall dresser full of his Legos. He made some pretty awesome stuff with them as well. He would also start with the actual planned model, but then would tear it apart and put the pieces with his stash and create some fun stuff. For example, right under his hand, that big stack of white things, those are “actually” sacks of sand from some Pirates of the Caribbean set.

3485202560_9e7e50c628_o 3484244885_6948a21f3e_o

Jamison was the King of Sticks. As you can see, he would gather them from his walks. Walking to/from school or the park, he’d see a stick he liked, he’d bring it home. He could almost always find a stick that somehow looked like a gun. The kid knew his sticks.


Nothing better than some time on the playground. This one was a little further from our house, but he liked it better. Also, it was a little bit closer to his favorite ice cream.


Greater’s Black Raspberry Chip. Oh yeah.


It wouldn’t be a day in the life if you didn’t lose a tooth, right?

3485200064_f215f3b770_o 3485058448_c4f5e31110_o

Nothing like a nice bubble bath after a successful weekend. He’d sit there for hours. Then he turned into one of those boys that I have to bribe to get him in the shower. Why do boys do that? I will never understand.


Yep. He’s a pretty great kid. I love that underneath it all, he really hasn’t changed much. And that is just fine by me.


Lessons From My Son

So last night I had a “date night” of sorts with my son. I won a gift card to a restaurant over the holiday and it’s a place he loves that we never get to go to, ’cause it isn’t a favorite of everyone in the family. So when we have a night alone together, I try to take him there. We also got him some new gloves and had a new key made (so he can get into the house again – until he loses it … again) and generally had an evening to just kind of hang out.

During the driving around and dinner, we were listening to a favorite podcast (Rooster Teeth) and just talking about stuff. Somehow we got on Urban Dictionary word definitions. We got there via talking about Cards Against Humanity … so yeah … it was that kind of conversation.


He was telling me that he learned some things he didn’t ever want to know by looking up terms from a Cards Against Humanity Game on the Urban Dictionary. Then somehow we got to looking up the definition of your name. I went first and the first couple were funny:

kim def 1

Okay, I can live with that.

kim def 2

Truth. I’ve never met Chuck Norris and I’m pretty sure it’s because he is terrified of me.

Then … it got a little interesting:

kim def 3

Then … it got just plain WTF is going on style weird:

kim def 11

So … after laughing at a bunch of really strange definitions of my name, and discovering that a lot of people named Kim and have had some strong and interesting impacts on the lives of people who post things on Urban Dictionary, we switched to Jamison’s name. His “Top Definition” started off pretty standard and then took a bit of a turn:

jamison def 1

“… bury you in the woods.” Um … okay then. As I was laughing at this, my son chimed in with a very knowing tone: “You should read the second one!” Now, this obviously means that he’s checked his name on Urban Dictionary and the second definition in the list made enough of an impact on him that he remembered it:

jamison def 2

Absolutely amazing. I like to think that in his heart, my son believes that the first sentence in this definition is the true meaning of his name. Also, that “used in a sentence” example is pretty epic. The middle of this is a bit odd – but the beginning and end – totally my son.

He only had two pages of definitions compared to the bajillion for my name. But there were a couple of note:

jamison def 3

Again, many aspects of this are totally him. It does begin to ramble a bit though.

And then there was this one:

jamison def 5

For all the definitions about how amazing Jamison is … I guess it sucks to live there.

However you look at it .. my definitions all have a common theme and so do his. And his basic theme is true. He’s an awesome person. A friend just recently told me that, even at 15, you can already tell that Jamison is going to grow up to be a basically awesome human being. He has a fantastic sense of humor, he is smart, he is quick, he is kind.

And if you ever play Cards Against Humanity against him … he will most likely kick your ass.

Save Me From Myself

So, this morning, in a giant moment of weakness, I decided to swing by Panera for breakfast of some kind. To be totally honest, my idea was to stop in and if they had any of their amazing warm chocolate chip cookies sitting there … I was totally having that for breakfast.

cookies for breakfast

I. Am. So. Weak.

Luckily for me, Panera is waaaaaay smarter than I am and they had zero warm cookies available for breakfast. So instead I got a Spinach Mushroom & Sofrito Egg Souffle and it was both yummy and way better for me.


So, thank you Panera. For saving me from myself and allowing me to eat something yummy and significantly more healthy than a giant chocolate chip cookie. Although, if that cookie had been there I would have totally eaten it for breakfast and not thought twice about it.

fuck to give

Cookies: Breakfast for Those Who Give Zero Fucks.

Could I Be?

I’m a fan of Tumblr. I can waste hours on Tumblr watching gifs of my favorite shows and movies and losing myself in stupid viral videos. It is a huge time suck for me and a place I go when I’m totally bored and just need to kill time or find a way to numb my brain from what is happening around me.

Recently I lost myself down the Tumblr rabbit hole of Friends related pages. And I discovered something. I am Chandler Bing.

Let me explain:

do with my life

I’m 45 years old and I have no idea what I want to be when I grow up. I mean, I know what I’d like to be doing, but without unlimited free time and a shit ton of money for a whole new college education … that’s not gonna happen. So … yeah.

dumb things

I’m an idiot. I have a kick-ass sense of humor and have been told by many people that I’m quite funny. But really … just an idiot.

make fun

If you say something dumb, or make a typo on Facebook, misspeak a cliche, or fall down … I will make fun of you. Relentlessly.

sarcastic comment

Sarcasm is my first language. Some days … it’s my only language.

regret eat

Food is a huge weakness for me. I started running to, yes lose weight and get in shape, but also so I can continue to eat whatever I want. Even if that means I have Whoppers for breakfast and Swedish Fish for lunch and a large pizza with 6 beers for dinner, so be it. At least I ran today.

swallow our feelings

I will swallow my feelings until I explode. And even then I’ll pick them all up and put them right back in where they belong.

self loathing

The amount of guilt and crippling low self esteem I carry with me daily is staggering. Sometimes I wonder how I can manage to walk to the bathroom when I get out of bed in the morning.

long day

I love a good bath. I swear, if I won the lottery, I’d spend it all on Lush bath bombs.

And to round out my similarities:


Yep. I am Chandler Bing. And I’m pretty okay with that.

2016: The Year of The Tattoo

2016 is going to be quite a year for me. I have decided this. I haven’t made any specific resolutions or anything like that, but this year will be different. I’m determined to find my “happy place” and be the best me – the real me.

This will also be the year I get a tattoo … I have officially decided that as well.

I have a lot of ideas as far as what kind of tattoo I want. My problem is I have too many ideas, and as is in my nature, I’m pretty certain that once I get one, I won’t be able to stop there.

Some of my ideas have some deep meanings behind them.

For example, this one, inspired by the “Project Semicolon” movement:

semicolon - story not over

Project Semicolon describes itself as a “movement dedicated to presenting hope and love to those who are struggling with depression, suicide, addiction, and self-injury. Project Semicolon exists to encourage, love, and inspire.”

Be definition a semicolon means that the author could have chosen to end the sentence, but then choose not to. The parallel being that the sentence is your life and you are the author.

These next three are all inspired by my dad, who I lost to Esophageal Cancer in 1999. He loved anything that had to do with Ireland and the Irish. So these designs are extremely special to me:

Some of them have roots in Pop Culture – which is shocking I know.

Like this adroable “Up” inspred tattoo:

adventure is out there

Or this thought from Peter Pan:

never grow up

Or any number of Doctor Who inspired Circular Gallifreyan designs:


Or this fantastic message from JRR Tolkien:

not all who wander are lost

Then there are just the things I have found on Pinterest that I think are totally adorable:

Like, who doesn’t love a super cute singing elephant?

singing elephant

Or this beautiful watercolor style bird:


Or for the gamer nerd inside me:

power button

So yeah, I plan on getting a tattoo this year. At least one, and then who knows, maybe someday they will write song about me as well!